A Holy Spirit Right Hook- Lesson in Forgiveness

Tweet

And the Story Begins…

Not too long ago, I found myself on the wrong side of a punch that rocked my world. It didn’t take place in a boxing ring. I wasn’t in a physical altercation with anyone. I was simply withholding forgiveness from a fellow brother in Christ. Somehow, I allowed sin to creep in little by little until I didn’t recognize the damage it had caused. Frustrations grew, and quickly they ate away at my soul. Criticism, judgment, and a lack of compassion toward him continued to grow. It grew to a point that I couldn’t take it anymore. I was done. Ready to end our relationship, or, so I thought.

A fight I didn’t know I was fighting.

According to the boxing dictionary, the definition of a rather effective punch against an opponent is a:

Hook: This punch is thrown with the lead or front hand and is delivered in a semi-circular pattern. The hook is executed by leading with your front hand, bringing your elbow up and rotating the front side of your body (in a similar motion as slamming a door). It is meant to reach beyond your opponent’s guard and make contact with the side of his head or chin.

Words Matter

I’m not sure of the exact words or phrasing that came out of my mouth, but I was something to the effect of “He says this, and does that. I don’t know how He can call himself a Christian.” It might not seem too alarming of a comment to you, but as it left my mouth-I immediately wanted to pull each one of those words back into my mouth and nestle them back in a safe place. Hurtful words, like toothpaste, cannot be put back into its container.

I made this comment to a close friend-not the person whom I was frustrated, but I brought someone with me to the sinning game. Isn’t that always how sin works? Sin breeds more sin. That’s why it spreads so quickly. What we do and how we react is a choice, but it also affects others as well. Sin works in the same fashion. The consequence of sin affects everyone-not just the person committing the act of sin. I had to get someone on my team.

Square in the Jaw

As I said before, the moment those words left my tongue, I wanted them back. Guilt, shame, and regret were things I felt at that moment. You see, I felt the Holy Spirit hit me square in the jaw.

Have you ever experienced anything like that before?

Not only did the Holy Spirit wake me up from my sinful daze, but He also gave me a word. The Parable of The Unforgiving Servant found in Matthew 18:21-35 quickly was recalled to my memory. It was if I heard the words, “You wicked servant, have I not forgiven you of all your debts?”

How did it get to this point?

I possessed hurt feelings that were left bottled up inside. Thoughts and hurt feelings began to pile up. My heart and mind twisted words I heard into an attack on my character. I never communicated how his words hurt me.

As children, we all have said or heard someone say, “sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” That could not be farther from the truth.

On the contrary, words cut deep. They affect our emotional, spiritual, and physical states. Never addressing the issue, it continued. Instead of dealing with the problem, I internalized it and consumed the majority of my thoughts. You see, I am a people-pleaser. I thrive off of the affirmation of others. I like it when people love me. The love of people was the measure in which I was finding my worth.

Worth

Where should I have found my worth? I whole-heartedly know the truth of the gospel of Jesus Christ. He lived the life I was supposed to live and died the death I was condemned to die. Intellectually, I know that God loves me and is working all things for His glory and my good, but internally, I have struggled to believe His approval of me is the only one that matters.

There is an ever-constant battle with sin and listening to the lies of the enemy we all face.

In Christ, I  am worthy to be called a child of God. My worth is measured by the unconditional love that my heavenly Father has demonstrated time and again. He created me in His image. There is nothing that I could do or have done that would ever change the way He loves me. My worth is found in Him and not in the opinions of others. I lost sight of that and began to dwell on their opinions of me instead of God’s opinion of me.

Forgiveness heals the heart

As I reflected on the Unforgiving Servant Parable, I realized that I had not forgiven my brother in Christ for the words that I interpreted as hurtful. Instead, I let them harden my heart to the point of having an unforgiving spirit that caused division in our friendship. The Holy Spirit revealed this to me in the hours that followed the conviction and guilt of the words that left my tongue. I spent time in prayer, asking God to forgive me for sinning against Him and asked for the courage to ask my brother to forgive me as well.

The Holy Spirit gave me the courage to reach out to my friend and arrange a meeting. We met, and I asked for forgiveness, and also expressed the hurt I had held in for quite some time. He forgave me for my actions and asked the same for his own.

Weight-lifting saved my life

The weight of the burden that I felt for so long was lifted off of my shoulders and placed on Jesus. As the weight lifted off of my shoulders, it was freeing, refreshing, and resting not only for my soul but my physical and emotional well-being as well.

My past, present, and future sins have been forgiven. Jesus died once for all sin. Many years ago, I heard that we forget that we are a first a sinner, and secondly, sinned against. This parable shows us that God desires all to demonstrate forgiveness to others. Jesus says in Mark 11:25 that as we pray, be sure to forgive others of their wrongdoings.

There is also a warning in these passages. We will experience the punishment for our sin-debt if we do not forgive others. We either let Jesus pay the penalty of our sin, or we pay for it ourselves.

Not Alone

In summary, this post and my vulnerability by reminding each of us that we have to diligently fend off the enemy by living in relationship with Christ. Above all, we guard our hearts and minds by reading, praying, and memorizing God’s Word. Our pride is offended more often than we like to admit; however, forgiveness and humility are the cure for hearts of stone.

Join me in forgiving others just as Christ has forgiven us.